POLITICS

"I was raised the old-fashioned way, with a stern set of moral principles: Never lie, cheat, steal or knowingly spread a venereal disease. Never speed up to hit a pedestrian or, of course, stop to kick a pedestrian who has already been hit. From which it followed, of course, that one would never ever -- on pain of deletion from dozens of Christmas card lists across the country -- vote Republican."

Barbara Ehrenreich


"Santa Claus wears a Red Suit,
He must be a communist.
And a beard and long hair,
Must be a pacifist.
What's in that pipe that he's smoking?"

Arlo Guthrie


"We should declare war on North Vietnam.... We could pave the whole country and put parking strips on it, and still be home by Christmas. "

Ronald Reagan


"Christmas is great. There's something in it for everyone: The Democrats like it because there's deficit spending and the Republicans like it because you get to cut down a tree."

Garrison Keillor